Prepping for the Debate

Wow. I'm not sure I can take another presidential debate. Watching Mr. Bush ignore legitimate questions posed by the American people is painful.

However, General J.C. Christian shares some ideas to help:

We have to be on our toes for tonight's debate. It's very probable that Our Furious Leader will go into a violent fit of rage, pull a piece from his waistband, and shoot Bob Schieffer. We can't prevent it from happening--killing is how Our Leader deals with frustration. We can, however, try to put a positive spin on it. I've created the following talking points to help you do just that.

* Our Leader suspected that Schieffer had a weapon of mass destruction in his pocket.
* Zell would have called Our Leader a pussy if he hadn't defended the family honor.
* Sure, Our Leader killed a respected journalist on national TV, but Kerry forgot Poland. The liberal media is showing its bias by not reporting that too.
* Did you see that perfect military style shooting stance?
* Hey, didn't the terrorist threat level just go to red?
* Yes, it's true that no one found WsMD in his pockets, but he had weapons of mass destruction program related activities stuffed in his sock.
* You may have noticed that the handgun he used was a .50 cal. Desert Eagle Mark XIX. It's the most powerful handgun in the world. You can tell a lot about a man by the caliber of his gun.
* Schieffer is a French name, isn't it?
* Our Leader isn't afraid to exercise his God-given Second Amendment rights on the campaign trail.