Jesus' General Does John Stossel

I am embarrassed to admit I once, very long ago, thought ABC's Stossel wasn't too bad. Color me naive beyond redemption.

From Jesus' General, one of his (in)famous letters:

John StosselABC News
Dear Mr. Stossel,

It wasn't easy being a libertarian before you came along. Between the pocket protectors and the solitary nature of our love lives, economic libertarians garnered little respect. You changed that. You made it safe for us to worship the Free Market Fairy in public again. You did it by boldly championing free market principles like the right to sell $20 bottles of water to desperate Katrina survivors and again, more recently, when you endorsed the creation of unregulated organ markets.

I think that last idea, selling organs, might be something Our Leader and his servants in Congress could get behind. Indeed, it's the kind of thing that they could use to convince the public that they're actually doing something to address the healthcare crisis.

Think about it. This is our answer to demands for universal healthcare. No one need worry about the cost of chemotherapy as long as he or she a family member or two who's willing to part with a kidney. If family members are reluctant to part with their internal capital assets, then the patient can always mortgage their corneas or sell their tainted bone marrow to a less ethical organ broker. Everybody wins in the end.