To Mr. Borden

... my faithful reader and old friend.

A word of warning: your daughter Lizzie may suggest you nap today but you could wind up with a splitting headache afterwards and btw, your wife, Abby, is hatched to death up in the guest room. What a mess!

(For those of you who don't recall the lore, on this day in 1892, someone bludgeoned the elderly Andrew J and Abby Durfee Gray Borden to death in their 92 Second Street in Fall River, Mass home. You know the rhyme... "Lizzie Borden took an axe, gave her father forty whacks; when she saw what she had done, she gave her mother forty-one." Lizzie was a Sunday School teacher and Andrew's 32-year-old daughter.)

Gotta love repressed New Englanders.