Uh... I Hope this is a Joke But With the Bushies, Who Can Tell?

From Michael Berube:

Washington, January 31– Following on her protest last week against a PBS cartoon character’s visit to Vermont, where he encounters a lesbian couple, Secretary of Education Margaret Spellings announced at a press conference today that her department was not engaged in a “trivial” or “merely symbolic” campaign against a children’s television program.

“Buster Bunny is not the problem,” said Spellings. “Though I note with some dismay that Buster travels the country accompanied only by his father because his parents are divorced, and I do not see why our children should be subjected to yet another glamorization of the divorce lifestyle. No, the problem is Vermont itself. It is Vermont to which I object. Christians everywhere should be outraged that it was represented in this children’s program.”

Spellings proceeded to unveil the Department of Education’s proposed map of the “forty-nine God-fearing United States,” with the “territory of Vermont” represented by a lightly shaded area. “Until such time as Vermont sees fit to rejoin the rest of the nation in condemning gay ‘civil unions,’” Spellings said, reading from a prepared statement, “we propose that Vermont be visually expelled from the heterosexual Union. We further propose that the nation’s students be instructed that Vermont is no longer a real state, and that they will not be responsible for remembering its capital, which is not only obscure but French-sounding as well.”

Robert Knight, director of the Culture and Family Institute of Concerned Women for America, the nation’s largest public policy women’s organization, had warm praise for Spellings. “Parents don’t want their children homosexualized in the name of ‘education,’” Knight said. “Mrs. Spellings has given notice that left-wing lobbies will have to find other ways to peddle their pansexual propaganda. Let’s hope that other leaders in federal and state agencies find a backbone thanks to her courageous example.”

Focus on the Family director James Dobson also endorsed Spellings’ decision, saying that “it kills a lot of birds with one stone” by taking a strong stand against gay rights while eliminating “three or four really bothersome figures” from American politics. “We’ve long known that ‘Vermont’ is basically just a code word for the gay agenda,” Dobson said, “and it’s about time our nation’s leaders eliminated Vermont, just as we at Focus on the Family have eliminated other homosexual code words like ‘diversity’ and ‘tolerance.’”

As a Vermonter, I can honestly say we're not much in love with a good part of the rest of the U.S. either. Each week, more and more people are talking about breaking off to become a separate republic again.